McCain fails Gmail Goggles test…Important email never sent

Corrupting the News…

It’s three a.m. and your children are sleeping. There’s a phone in the White House, and it’s ringing. There’s something going on in the world, and your vote will determine who answers that call.

Who do you trust – Barack Obama or John McCain?

While he might trumpet his leadership, country pride, and military valor, a recent failure indicates John McCain may not be the man America needs driving the truck home at 3 in the morning

When attempting to send Sarah Palin an urgent email warning her to steer clear of racial undertones in attacks on Barack Obama, McCain failed the Gmail Goggles test and the email was never sent.

McCain was introduced the computer last month

McCain was introduced the computer last month

The result was the vice presidential candidate sounding like a shameless racist while accusing Senator Obama of “palling around with terrorists” during campaign stops in Florida. “He doesn’t think like us,” she was recorded as saying.

And now her people are pissed off at McCain.

“Because of John McCain, Sarah Palin looks like a freakin’ bigot,” said Palin aide, Sam Brown. “This last week is going to sink her entire political career. She’ll co-host a show with Martha Stewart and Rachel Ray before she ever sets foot in the White House.”

The new Google tool – Gmail Goggles – is a corrective lens designed to prevent drunken would-be email senders from embarrassing themselves with “I miss you” and “I want you back – I fucking LOVE YOU!!!” letters to ex-lovers.

While effective, the program sometimes has unintended consequences.

When asked to fill in the blank in the line “We hold these truths to be self-evident: That all men are created_____;” McCain evidently answered “lesser than me, my friends.”

Concluding the sender must be extremely inebriated, McCain’s message was stored in Drafts until the morning. Unfortunately for his campaign, it was already too late.

“This is a goddamn travesty because that senile loon shouldn’t of even had internet access, let alone the responsibility of sending confidential emails at two in the morning,” said Republican strategist, Francine Doyle. “What was he even doing up that late? Lord knows this proves if he got a call in the White House at three a.m. he’d probably cough, fart and roll over.”

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2 Comments

Filed under Corrupting the News

2 responses to “McCain fails Gmail Goggles test…Important email never sent

  1. omgdidisaythat

    astute, fingers on the pulse, all that sort of business. Funny.

    Thank you

  2. Sleeptime

    That McCain couldn’t tell a pen from a pencil, let alone handle any technology beyond the can opener.

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