1 in 7 still undecided? Who the hell are these people?

Considering the News…

There’s so many poll numbers out right now the backs of my eyes throb and my hands are shaking. It’s not even noon but I know a stiff drink might be the only thing to remedy the anxiety. Can’t imagine how Obama’s feeling right now. He has to be fiendish for a smoke, wondering what harm two or six puffs actually inflict.

Despite brewing relatively sizable leads in most polls not conducted by Fox News or the McCain camp, Obama still fears his fate rests with those mindboggled undecideds. They’re scary people for a candidate like him. So persuadable…”moveable” or “changeable” as they’re often called.

A Yahoo!-Associated Press poll says 14 percent have no freaking clue who they’ll vote for. 14 percent! That’s 1 in 7 people who get to the front of the McDonald’s line and act like they’re really pondering some unprecedented order, only to decide on the same Big Mac meal they get every other damn time. Not good for the new chicken wrap that is Barack’s candidacy.

The Washington Post estimates the clueless society to be closer to 10 percent, which is several points lower than this same time in 2000 and 2004. So I suppose we’re at least making some progress as a society.

The McCain camp is confident the majority of undecideds will secretly, quietly sneak over to the maverick, come election day, saying this sector of the electorate are, “older, downscale, more rural and are certainly economically stressed.”

Older, downscale, more rural. I won’t speculate what this really means, but I’m confident in my readers’ intelligence and ability to decipher the GOP code inherent in that statement.

But luckily these undecideds have wittled away at these candidates’ stances, as the Associated Press reports that when “Asked where they disagree with Obama, changeable voters most frequently mention taxes and the economy, health care, abortion and social issues such as gun control, and personal traits including his race and his honesty. For McCain, it’s the economy and taxes, health care, foreign policy and abortion.”

So there you have it. They disagee with both candidates on taxes, the economy, health care, and abortion. However, McCain has a slight disadvantage on foreign policy, and Obama is struggling with race and guns.

That’s right, you just read that correctly. This election will boil down to race, guns and war. Phew! It’s a goddamn relief we at least have our priorities straight.

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2 Comments

Filed under Dirty Politics

2 responses to “1 in 7 still undecided? Who the hell are these people?

  1. The Joker

    I’m still undecided about who I’m voting for, but not because of guns or race. Who is Joe the Plumber leaning toward? I trust his opinion.

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